Sight

So, yesterday was difficult but I got through it.  What happened? Recently, I have been reading even more than usual about empaths and what it means to be an empath. My last therapist introduced the subject to me because as I have mentioned previously, he had quite the read on me.  I will not saddle…… Continue reading Sight

Memories While Asleep

“Come and be as cool as you can be.” “Your love for me is everything.” I have spoken about this new phenomenon involving dreams. For several months now, I dream vividly each night and remember each dream. The nightly total typically ranges between three to six. Luckily, there have been few upsetting episodes and even…… Continue reading Memories While Asleep

The Ward

“I love it when you’re holding me. You have a gentle way of calming.” “I was strong and desperately brave and I didn’t mean to scare ya.” I have written about my hospitalization. I was admitted for nine days, almost all of them in the psych ward. Lately, I have been remembering that time and…… Continue reading The Ward

Awaken

It is Tuesday morning and I am still here. Even to an individual with quite the imagination, I am still clinging to the reeds.  I want to talk about the power of thought. I want to talk about the ways minutes and hours can change. I want to talk about possible dismissal. So, our minds…… Continue reading Awaken

Diagnosis

I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type and agoraphobia. My earliest memories were from adolescence. I saw the ground move up and down and a door open and close. However, my experiences with psychosis existed long before. I too sat alone and pondered how the world worked, how it related to me and when…… Continue reading Diagnosis

Dream A Little Dream of Me

“Well, it took some time cause it’s a lot, God, it’s a bunch, it’s such a big, old, black golden buzz.” The cognitive gusts have been tirelessly attempting to outdo themselves lately. For two consecutive sessions after asking me to use my time to research psychosis, my therapist and I discussed the topic, connecting the…… Continue reading Dream A Little Dream of Me

The Trail

“Forgiveness, can you imagine?” He walks the length of the muddied trail…a trail of dewy bark, lively leaves spreading their aim, shame and torment. The trail, he felt, provided the lone connection to renewal. Time swept stones missing so much of their luster, begging for a return, a purpose. The wind’s song battles foundations. He…… Continue reading The Trail

To Rosie

“The song is ended but the melody lingers on.” Rosie- I never met you. I will never meet you. For that, I look downward, seeing through the walls of my shadow. I have, however, heard your name spoken. One gracious individual you left behind has blessed me with his friendship. M understands the value of…… Continue reading To Rosie

The Tide Washes In

I open by stating that this is an especially heavy post and feel that it would be irresponsible not to warn of its potential to serve as a trigger. At times I write to tell a story, to honor a presence or artistic expression that is meaningful to me and other times I write to…… Continue reading The Tide Washes In

Crompton Collective (an excerpt)

Separated by a stretch of highways and a series of bustling toll booths, we envisioned meeting at the onset in Onset. A short flight and a drive east brought me there. It was late morning. The water sat calmly, conveniently ours. The Victorian homes decorated themselves with family heirlooms and area rugs, inhaling salty sea…… Continue reading Crompton Collective (an excerpt)